Solitary 400 sq ft

I realize how much has happened in the past 6 weeks since my birthday post ...


-- My sister coming back to Portland after her 7 months bike travels. This was her longest, but certainly not her first impressive, bike trip. She rode from Vancouver, BC to Tierra del Fuego, Argentina on her bike, by herself. Anything I could say about that accomplishment feels inadequate. She's amazing. She stayed with me for a few weeks, and I love having her around. However, my cottage is only 400 sq ft. She gets alone time here when I'm at work, but I never get alone time when she's visiting. Her future from this point isn't clear, and she is less of a city-person than I am. She decided to go to Mountain Home in Coquille, OR for the winter. It's a homestead with natural building and permaculture where she lived before her travels this year. It was good to have her here, but I'm glad to have my space back.

-- Traveling to St Louis to visit my other soul-mate Renee. Since I moved to Portland, we've seen each other only once a year. Felt odd to be back in St Louis ... even though it has only been 2 years, it has felt like much longer. I suppose this is true about any place that we move from, in which your life continues to progress and change in your new locale, but your old home continues to exist outside of your day-to-day awareness.

Her car was stolen a few weeks before I arrived, so we spent much time getting around on foot. The weather cooperated, cooled down and didn't much rain. When I first arrived it was 82 degrees ... quite a bit different from the 40 degree morning I left in Portland.


-- Krishna Das concert with Miguel. We saw him in concert last year as well. He's an American but learned kirtan singing in India and now sings kirtan music all over the world. Concerts in Portland take place at a large church downtown with call-and-response singing and some ecstatic dancing to boot.


-- An elective month (hence getting to travel to St Louis, taking my first vacation since February) spending time in dermatology clinic, sports medicine clinic, and learning more ADHD treatment (until the attending had her baby - what is it like to work all the way up until delivery?). And a day or two here and there spending time on my own mental health, getting to hike and read for fun. Took a hike into the Columbia Gorge.





-- Reading _The Wild Trees_ by Richard Preston about finding the tallest and largest trees in the Northwest, primarily the redwoods in California and studying their canopy. What an amazing story. At times the writing isn't the best, but the book is fascinating.

-- Less than 8 months left of residency ... :-)

Heaters and love

I'm sitting in one of my favorite spots - in front of the heater. Growing up, I had the bedroom directly over the heater in the basement. So, the heat register in my room had the warmest and most forceful flow of air. I spent many a minute sitting on the heater, soaking up the warmth before it could get into the house. Always a sad moment when it would click off; the air would get colder and then the air flow turned off. Comforting memories.

What a lazy weekend this has been with Miguel: Lebanese food at Ya Halla (fantastic restaurant) for Friday dinner, downtown farmer's market, walking up in the NWst and looking in shops on 23rd - not our usual activity together since neither of us are shoppers, spur of the moment Mexican lunch, Wordstock at the Convention Center and listening to Harry Shearer (many voices in the Simpsons), lentil-pumpkin soup for dinner, watching Falling (recent Austrian film about 5 women in their early 30s meeting after many years at the funeral of a beloved teacher). Then going for a short run together this morning. It has been a good weekend, good time together. Reaffirming that even though there will be challenges to being together, we are good together. We get along well, understand each other, are never bored in each other's company, always have conversation topics. I believe we truly are soul mates.

My dad knows to some degree about our relationship. I haven't spoken with my mother about it ... yet. I keep saying that I need to tell her but obviously haven't. Given everything that has gone on with her and my dad these past several months, I think she might be in a more receptive state to really hear me. I'm just scared about the possibility of her rejection. Recently I've tried to put the intention out into the universe that she will at least be supportive.